Top Ten Things I'll Do When I'm Kicked To The Curb!

Yesterday, I did something for the first time in my life.  You probably won't believe it, if you read this blog on a regular basis, but I've never in my life pulled an April Fool's trick.  I guess I figure that since I mess with people so much of the year, I'd give them April Fool's day off.  I'm a contrarian!

Well, yesterday, I constructed a tale where the end result was that we might get kicked out of our house.  I was careful to weave in reality in such a way that 90% of the post was entirely true.  This made the other 10% believable.

Well, my wife totally bought it.  I was a bit surprised by this, yet delighted! The best part is that when I called her in the afternoon and she demanded to know how long I've known about this situation, I was trying to choke back laughing (and actually laughed out loud at several points), which she mistook for me being UPSET somehow.  I squeaked out that I would talk about it later, then sat at my desk for a while, giggling in glee.

So, now that I've pulled this stunt over on her, I need to do a little risk mitigation and make a plan for what I'll do if she kicks me to the curb over this.  Here, in the popular top ten list format, are the "Top Ten Things I'll Do When I'm Kicked To The Curb!"

1. I will compete with the homeless guys in the neighborhood in raiding the recylcing bins for cans on trash day!  A person has to have an income.
2. I will build a raft out of driftwood and debris and float the Mississippi just like Huckleberry Finn!
3. While sitting in my makeshift lean-to at night, I will work on the grand-unification theory - over candlelight - that has eluded scientists for generations.
4. I will take a correspondence course on how to make my own wicker furniture!
5. I'll travel the continent via boxcar!
6. I'll finally have time to get past the point I'm stuck on "The Legend of Zelda - The Phantom Hourglass" on my DS. I figure I can recharge it at park pavilions. They usually have power.
7. Peddle a line of "Hobo Fashion" down at Soulard Market.  I'm thinking it could take off just like the street gang fashion look that is so popular now! This could make me rich!
8. I'll make necklaces out of twisted clover and leave on my ex-porch for my kids.
9. I'll hunt for actual Indian artifacts.
10. I'll form a band, down by the river, with the other husbands who successfully pulled an April Fool's prank on their wife!

Now, I'm not saying that my wife is showing any signs of being upset over this, but you know how things can just fester!  However,  if "One Dad's Life" should suddenly go offline, you'll know what happened.

Comments

[Rob]

I'm glad I didn't leave the sympathetic comment I had typed out, figured there was a pretty good chance it was all a prank...

[abunslife]

I had a pretty good idea it was a fake....especially since you NEVER complain about anything in your blog. That is what tipped me off! Pretty good one though!

[Courtney]

I waited until today to comment because I thought something was fishy!! Ha!