One of the interesting and unexpected side-effects of writing this blog on a regular basis is that I have started getting all kinds of interesting and exciting emails wanting me to promote this or that, give away this or that, appear on a TV show, etc. etc. etc.
To date, I have not accepted any of these very kind, and often somewhat amusing, offers. I'm not exactly sure why that is. Perhaps it's because I'm afraid that I would someday offer some amazing giveaway, like an all-expenses paid trip to Cancun, and THAT would be the day that no one responds. Because, that happens...usually when I write what I think is really a pretty funny post.
Like last Friday, for example. (I am now accepting pity comments on last Friday's post, FWIW. I'll wait here.) (update: It would appear that I didn't actually HAVE a Friday post. However, the link points to the Thursday post, which is the one I was actually talking about!)
The other reason I have not yet accepted any of these offers is that I'm afraid that accepting product or other consideration for writing a sponsored post would sully the purity of my stories. Stories about dogs driving cars, pushing my desk into an elevator, and spreading toothpaste on my bagel to save time in the morning!
That is not to say that I wouldn't accept the right offer if it came along. Are you listening Nintendo, Dr. Pepper, Nikon, Gibson Guitars, Taylor Guitars, Fender, Mesa-Boogie, and Kurzweil Professional Keyboards?
Hello? I can be bought!
The one thing I have done on a number of occasions is agree to magazine and online publication interviews. Why? Well, because basically, "to know me is to love me" as they say and I just don't think there is enough love in the world. Therefore, it makes sense that the more of ME in the world and the more people that "know" me, the more LOVE there will be in the world! I'm a humanitarian like that. I'm here to help! Oh, you are so welcome!
The very coolest offer I received, and very nearly accepted (but couldn't due to schedule) was blogging about the St. Louis Home and Garden Show. This would have been very cool as they would have given me tickets to give away and other fun things, but then if you read paragraph number two (above) - you'll see that it might not have worked out...which would have been embarrassing. Anyway, hopefully they contact me again next year! (Nudge, nudge, wink, wink).
So now that I've taken this long to brag explain how I get all these offers, I'll get to the primary story I wanted to tell. A few days ago, I received yet another pretty standard email inquiring about my interest in promoting a certain online store. It all seemed pretty normal (and unfortunately NOT one of the eight products mentioned above) until I got to the following line. I will paraphrase, so as to save face for the obviously well-meaning individual that wrote to me.
"More than ever, we feel like the voice of the Mom Blogger fits our mission!"
Um, what? "Mom Blogger?" Apparently, I have NOT been clear about my gender and the point of view of this website! I just assumed that the site name of "One Dad's Life" as well as a contact email address that starts with "dadincharge" would drop a couple of subtle hints. I guess I was too cleverly subtle. That happens sometimes. Theoretically, that's probably what happens when no one responds to posts like last Friday. I should start a "cleverly subtle" consulting firm so others could make use of this ability. I should rent out my excess brain power! Or maybe I should just use it for something productive like learning how to feed myself without getting the food on my shirt...without bibs. It's so good to have goals.
One time, I actually did write a guest post on a "Mom Blog" for "A Bun's Life", but that is the closest I've ever been to a Mom Blogger. Well, I now know a TON of "Mom Bloggers" because St. Louis is the biggest small town you've ever seen and so of COURSE we've all met each other. So we've BEEN close. Me and the other "Mom Bloggers." I mean me and THE "Mom Bloggers." Not the other "Mom Bloggers." I'm not a Mom Blogger. Although, with the number of times I just typed "Mom Blogger", Google is just going to send everyone directly to this blog that is looking for a "Mom Blogger." I'd better put the tea on!
I think I can see a few additional areas where I went wrong. I have frequently posted pictures of beautiful flowers. Not manly. I talk about my crazy children. Not manly. I take pictures of meals I've cooked. Not manly. I've posted pictures of gigantic underwear! Well, probably a touch more manly. However, I'm still at 75% NOT manly according to this tally.
Clearly, this must be fixed.
So today, I think I'll head on out back and split some firewood with some of my lumberjack tools, maybe replace the engine in my car - for FUN, duct tape something together and maybe catch some stuff on fire. MANLY things.
Then I'll blog about it. See? I'm NOT a "Mom Blogger."
Oh, and if some of eight companies listed above ever want to get together, I'll just wait here for my Mario Bros. themed Gibson Les Paul, which I will take lots of pictures of with my new Nikon D300 (hint, hint), while trying to make a dent in my year's supply of Diet Dr. Pepper!
Ah, life is good!